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Life's That Way: A Memoir, by Jim Beaver
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A remarkable memoir that shows the capacity of the human heart to heal after the challenge of having to say goodbye.
Even the hardest lessons contain great gifts.
Jim Beaver and his wife Cecily Adams appeared to have it all-following years of fertility treatments, they were finally parents and they were building their dream home and successful Hollywood careers. Life was good. But then their daughter, Maddie, was diagnosed as autistic. Weeks later, Cecily, a non-smoker, was diagnosed with Stage IV lung cancer. Sadly, after 14 years of marriage, Jim became a widower and a single dad.
Faced with overwhelming grief, Jim reached out to family and friends by writing a nightly email-a habit he established when Cecily was first diagnosed. Initially a cathartic exercise for Jim, the prose became an unforgettable journey for his readers. Life's That Way is a compilation of those profound, compelling emails.
- Sales Rank: #607373 in Books
- Published on: 2010-04-06
- Released on: 2010-04-06
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.30" h x .90" w x 5.50" l, .62 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 336 pages
From Publishers Weekly
Beaver, an actor, playwright and film historian, collects a series of riveting, heartfelt e-mails chronicling the courageous cancer battle of his beloved wife, Cecily, from her diagnosis of lung cancer to her death in little over a year. Unafraid to examine their life together and his acting career as a performer on two popular TV dramas, the role of Ellsworth on Deadwood and Bobby Singer on Supernatural, he kept family and friends informed with his nightly online messages of Cecily's deteriorating status and the bittersweet childhood of their autistic daughter, Maddie. The revealing e-mails depict the somber travail of Beaver on the horrific death watch of his wife, and detail the roller-coaster ride of emotion from hoping for a speedy halt to the disease's onslaught to experiencing the dark abyss of loss. After the death of his father during this time, he writes: This year of writing has freed me from the shackles I don't know I could have borne otherwise. While this cancer memoir often chills the reader to the core with pain and frustration, it offers countless reasons to cheer Beaver as a remarkable man, a loving husband and a responsible single parent. (Apr.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
Review
"Jim Beaver, the laconic character actor best known as the appealing prospector, aEllsworth, a on "Deadwood" has written a compassionate, funny, searing, and ultimately transcending memoir chronicling a year of tragedy, grief, and survival that would send the strongest of men, even an ex-marine and West Texas preacheras son, to their knees. As Jim puts it, aIam no Job a though I think we went to the same school.a That his story is so compulsively readable, inspiring, and ultimately hopeful is due entirely to Jimas bracing honesty, dry humor, and deeply felt humanity. Read this book, tell your friends about it, and then go hug your loved ones.a
a Robert Schenkkan, Pulitzer Prize winner for "The Kentucky Cycle,"
aTo have known and read this man over these years, reveals to me I knew nothing of what love could and should be.a
aEdward Asner
aWhen this journal first appeared, I learned to keep a jumbo-size box of tissues at the ready. You will crya and laughaas Jim unwraps his unvarnished heart and soul. It will evoke memories of everyone who ever touched your heart and remind you to talk from your heart to the people who mean something to you.a
aRussell Friedman, coauthor of "The Grief Recovery
Handbook" and "When Children Grieve" "Jim Beaver, the laconic character actor best known as the appealing prospector, aEllsworth, a on "Deadwood" has written a compassionate, funny, searing, and ultimately transcending memoir chronicling a year of tragedy, grief, and survival that would send the strongest of men, even an ex-marine and West Texas preacheras son, to their knees. As Jim puts it, aIam no Job a though I think we went to the same school.a That his story is so compulsively readable, inspiring, and ultimately hopeful is due entirely to Jimas bracing honesty, dry humor, and deeply felt humanity. Read this book, tell your friends about it, and then go hug your loved ones.a
a Robert Schenkkan, Pulitzer Prize winner for "The Kentucky Cycle,"
About the Author
Jim Beaver is a writer and actor who recently starred as Ellsworth on HBO's Emmy Award-winning series Deadwood. He played simultaneous roles on the hit shows Supernatural, Big Love, and John from Cincinnati. He will next be appearing on Harper's Island, a new show to air on CBS in 2009. Beaver is also a nationally recognized playwright and stage actor, writing and acting in award-winning productions. A Vietnam vet and a native of Laramie, Wyoming, Beaver was married to Cecily Adams (daughter of Don Adams) from 1989 until her death in 2004.
Most helpful customer reviews
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
An Honst and Deeply Moving Memoir
By L Parker
No other memoir has moved me quite like this one. I too lost a spouse/best friend to lung cancer and so much of what Jim writes about resonated with me. He writes with insight, humor, desperation, and a fierce honesty.
If you want to truly understand the process of losing a loved one in this manner; of the importance of loving support for the caregiver; and of the struggle to overcome the loss with sanity and humor intact-- I can't imagine a better book.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
A soulful journey of acceptance and finding peace
By Alice
I read it a while ago when I admire Jim Beaver and his family story. It wasn't until my grandmother's passing that I suddenly picked it up again. Jim Beaver and his daughter helped me with dealing about loss, acceptance and moving on. It was then that I felt very connected with this book. I great read and a great healing instrument.
28 of 30 people found the following review helpful.
Honest, Healing Lessons in Life, Loss, and Love
By Bardicvoice
This book was edited from an email journal actor Jim Beaver (Deadwood, Supernatural, Harper's Island) wrote each night for a year in 2003-4 to keep family and friends informed about his wife Cecily's desperate fight against cancer, and after her loss, about how he and his very young daughter Maddie continued on with their lives. There is grief here, together with brutally raw and honest pain, anger, fear, helplessness, guilt, and despair - but there is also joy, laughter, and hope, and most of all, there is love: Jim's love for his wife and daughter, their love for him, and the amazing outpouring of love and help from family, friends, and even strangers who responded to Cecily's struggle and its impact on others.
For anyone dealing with love and loss, this book has hope to offer and lessons in life to teach, all without a word of preaching. If you've loved and lost someone - parent, spouse, child, friend, lover - you've felt what's in this book, and reading it might help bring you healing, if only by letting you know that you are not alone in what and how you feel and by giving you the means and words to talk about it. I'm watching my mother being stolen by Alzheimer's, and this book speaks to me even in the midst of ongoing loss. Read it, and take comfort.
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